Inuyasha: Jerry Springer Style!
by DarkMiko05
Summary: Hehe...Just another one of those Jerry Springer things...Just read it! You could flame me if you want...Oh yeah...and minor character bashing...Review?rnEach chapter is just random...so it won't continue on...and on...and on...
1. Sesshomaru Gay?

**Disclaimer: I don't own him! But I do own a pair of socks and a plant...er...dead plant in the corner...**

**A/N: This is just for fun while I was typing up the other story I'm starting and thinking of chapter 8 for my first story. So hope you enjoy.**

**Warning: Some character bashing...hehe...(evil grins)**

**I guess this will have only one chapter so it's a one-shot i guess you could say. Anywayz...Enjoy!**

**Inuyasha: Jerry Springer Style! **

**Jerry Springer:** Welcome! On today's show the topic is: Is my half-brother gay? I never knew! mumbles If he is gay...maybe he'll go out with me then we can party hardy...

**Audience:** O.O

**Jerry Springer:** Uh...anyway please welcome our guest, Inuyasha!

(Inuyasha walks out onto the stage and takes a seat.)

**Jerry Springer:** Welcome Inuyasha. So why are you here?

**Inuyasha:** I'm here today cause I want to ask my half-brother Sesshomaru, if he's really gay. I mean he's ruining our family reputation. Not to mention he scared my friend Miroku! Miroku was your everyday pervert until he met my pitiful brother...

**Jerry Springer:** Well okay then...Well what would you do if you found out he is gay?

**Inuyasha:** First I'd hook him up with some of my gay friends of course. Then after I would obviously beat the crap out of him! That will bring...(babbles on and on about bringing him back to 'normal')

**Jerry Springer:** Please welcome Sesshomaru! Or Madame Fluffy-chan!

(Sesshomaru comes out dressed like a drag queen, and takes a seat...really close to Inuyasha...)

**Sesshomaru:** Hey everyone! Ooh...your fine! (looks at a fat man in the audience)

**Fat man:** Yooohooo! (waves a piece of cloth at Sesshy) Come 'ere lover boy!

(Sesshomaru stood up from his seat)

**Inuyasha:** (whispers to Sesshomaru) Hey, follow the script! You're not supposed to follow him! Plus you're with Jakotsu, remember? We're only doing this for the yen then we can go back to the Feudal Era!

**Sesshomaru:** (glares) Fine...but don't tell Jakotsu this...

**Jerry Springer:** So...who's this 'Jakotsu'?

**Sesshomaru:** He's my lover of course! He's my one and only love...

(Jaken suddenly jumps onto the stage from the audience)

**Jaken:** But Lord Sesshomaru! I thought I, Jaken, was your lover! Are you cheating on me behind my back? (sobs like a sissy girl)

**Sesshomaru:** Er...um...Of course not Jaken! I love you more then anything! Jakotsu is just my inflatable guy doll...(eyes shifts from left to right)

**Inuyasha:** O.O; What in...the seven hells...?

**Jerry Springer:** (whispers to Inuyasha) So does this answer your question...?

**Inuyasha:** (nods) Yeah...and I'm gonna leave...before I start hurling my lunch...(backs away slowly)

**high pitched voice:** Sesshomaru! How dare you cheat on me! I will beat you into a bloody pulp!

(Jakotsu walks out from the backstage)

**Audience:** (gasps, blinks)

**Sesshomaru:** Jakotsu! Eh...hehe...

**Jakotsu:** How dare you Sesshomaru! You toyed with my heart and now you're with this pathetic excuse for a demon! That...that pile of green crap? Why that thing is uglier then...

**Jaken:** Look who you're calling ugly, pretty boy!

**Jakotsu:** Why you...

**Audience:** Oooh...! Take it off! Take it off! (to Jaken)

(Jaken takes of his shirt er...kimono)

**Little Kid in the Audience:** Mommy! Mommy! That green poo has man boobies! Why does he have man boobies? Mommy! I'm scarred for life! My eyes hurt now mommy! Mommy, tell him to put his shirt back on! .

(Jerry Springer ran backstage, puking.)

**Sesshomaru:** (whispers to Jakotsu) You wanna go backstage and make out? Jaken was just my slave anyways...

**Jakotsu:** Nah...lets just make out here...(walks up to Sesshomaru and runs a finger on his arm)

(Inuyasha comes walking back with everyone on the Inuyasha crew)

**Inuyasha:** See, see? I told you he was gay! Now I want my ramen!

**Kagome:** He was actually right...he really didn't lie this time. Maybe he wasn't the lying, cheating dog I made him out to be...

**Inuyasha:** Hey! I'm standing right here yanno!

(Inuyasha and Kagome start fighting.)

**Naraku:** But Sesshy, honey! What about me? I loved you with all heart and the dead demons in my body!

**Little kid:** Oh boy...here we go. Toon in next time on Jerry Springer...I hope...Go mom!

(Kid's mom is beating Jaken up for 'flashing' her son...)

**Miroku:** (rocks back and forth behind a chair) Scary man-lady...scary man-lady...scary man-lady...

**Sesshomaru:** Miroku? Is that you?

**Miroku:** (screams like a girl and runs off stage.)

**(cricket chirps)**

Well I hope that was okay...i dunno...If it sucks...Oh well! I had nothing to do!

Review for the poor?


	2. Kikyo Bashers Dream

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything...i can't even afford a piece of mint...**

**A/N: After when I post this up...I'm gonna put my new story up! Yay! (throws colourful paper) Then i might update my first story...Love Is A Hard Thing. Well lets just hope for the best, ne?**

**Warning: Let me see...Kikyo lovers don't read...let's just leave it at that...**

**Inuyasha: Jerry Springer Style **

**Chapter 2**

**Jerry Springer:** Hello everyone and wel- (Gets beat up by Myouga)

**Myouga:** Well, erm...sorry for that...he wasn't supposed to be here you see...he should be in the bathroom tied up and getting beaten by my dear Shyouga...

**Audience:** We don't want to hear your life story you old fart! Just get on with the show for everyone's sake!

**Myouga:** Well that's certainly rude...haven't you ever heard of respecting your elders? For shame...Today's show will be 'Why does he go after her? I mean she's dead!' Please welcome Lady Kagome.

(Kagome walks out and does a little wave and sits)

**Kagome:** Oh hey Myouga what happened to Jerry-

**Myouga:** Nothing! Anyway...why are you here Lady Kagome?

**Kagome:** Well you already know Myouga...Whatever. Okay. I'm sick and tired of Inuyasha going after Kikyo every single time he see's, or senses her. Don't you see that she's a dead corpse! DEAD! D-E-A-D!

**Myouga:** ZzZz...

**Kagome:** (steam comes out of her ears) Myouga...

**Myouga:** Hm? Oh yeah..I'm the host now aren't I? Hehe... Let's bring Kikyo out now shall we?

(Kikyo walks out dresses like a slut and walks towards her seat...and trips over her high, high, HIGH heels.)

**Myouga:** Welcome Kikyo...my advice for you is to never, I mean NEVER where short skirts to this show...

**Kikyo:** Well I do wanna impress my Inu-Baby if I wanna win him over...(flips her hair)

**Audience:** Booo...! Get off the stage!

(Kikyo flashes)

**Some Guy:** AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! My eyes! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! (runs and crashes through the door)

**Kagome:** Kikyo you sick freak! Cover it up so you don't scare every single being on this planet will ya? If you wanna flash someone, do it somewhere where no one will see! Nasty! Anyways...Myouga? Where are you?

**Myouga:** . Help...? My eyes need surgery...Let's just bring out Master Inuyasha.

(Inuyasha walks out...and looks around)

**Inuyasha:** O.O Kikyo! What did you do!

**Kikyo:** Nothing Inu-Baby...That skank over there needs to keep out of our lives. She's just a dirty little whore who screws everyone...

**Kagome:** (huffs) Me a skank? Have you checked the mirror lately? Or are you too busy screwing everything you see? You're just like a door knob...everyone gets a turn!

**Audience:** Ooooh...

**Kikyo:** Why you stupid little bitch! (walks up to Kagome and 'tries' to hit her)

**Kagome:** What the...(pokes Kikyo's eyes)

**Kikyo:** AHHHHHH! My eyes! AHHHHHHH! I think I broke a nail! Hurry call 9-1-1-!

(Shippou walks out of nowhere)

**Shippou:** Oh for the love of -Would you shut up!- (walks up to Kikyo and kicks her shin) Take that ugly man-lady!

(Shippou walks away)

**Kikyo:** Owieeeee! See Inu-Baby? See what your friends put me through? (leans down to check her shin)

_Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiip_

**Inuyasha:** (snorts) Ahem...Kikyo...um...your...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

**Kagome:** Oh gawd...I think I'm gonna be sick...(saw Kikyo's thong...with Naraku patterns...)

(Miroku walks out and looks into the audience)

**Miroku:** Why hello there ladies. Care to bear my children? ...What is that horrible stench...? (turns around and sees Kikyo, ripped skirt and all...and faints)

**Sango:** Houshi-sama! Are you alright? (runs to Miroku) Kikyo! look what you did! ...Huh? Where'd she go?

(can hear running 'water' in the corner...) (everyone turns to see Kikyo squatting in the corner...)

**Inuyasha:** Kikyo...what in the seven hells are you doing! It reeks over there!

**Kikyo:** What do you think I'm doing? I'm relieving my bladder.

**Everyone:** O.O

**Kagome:** That's what the toilets are for! Duh! You don't go to the corners and...and...Do your business there!

**Kikyo:** But, these 'toilets' scare me! After when you're done, the water goes down then it comes up again! In the process it makes a loud noise!

**Inuyasha:** Kikyo, Oh my...Just go to the washroom! Gah!

(Kikyo runs and lunges at Inuyasha and latches onto his arm)

**Kikyo:** You wanna come with me, Inu-Baby...?

**Inuyasha:** Kikyo let my freakin arm go! We're over! Damn you stink like a rotting demon in the pits of hell.

**Kikyo:** But..but...Inu-Baby...

**Inuyasha:** Stop calling me Inu-Baby! We're through!

(Inuyasha walks back stage)

**Kagome:** Maybe that's why you should use the bathroom...(sigh)

**Everyone:** (nods and follows Kagome backstage)

**Kikyo:** Where is everyone going! You can't leave me here! I...I have a broken nail!

(lights turn off)

**Kikyo:** AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (Runs around and ran into a brick wall) .

**Myouga:** Eh...? Where did everyone go? Am..I Alone with Kikyo...? HELP!

End chapter

The botton down there...is your bestest friend!

Review! Ja Ne!


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